Angry

Am I allowed to be angry? To scream and to be mad at you. I hate you. But am I allowed to?
Am I allowed to say that it is all unfair, that life is unfair. That it hurts, that i am fed up with everything.
I hate you I hate you, I want to punch you, I want to howl, to tell you that I hate you.
You left me. You promised me you would never let me go but you did. You didnt fight to stay, you just went, and I hate you so much for that. WHY did you go?
I am so mad at you. I am making you an angel, a god, the god of my own religion, I am worshiping you, I am worshiping us, what we used to be so long ago but what's the point in this?
The truth is I hate you, because you had no right to leave.
And while I thought you were somewhere around looking after me, I am realizing you are not.
And if you are, then I hate you even more because what you're doing to me is so mean.
You can't make me hope to break everything.
I want to howl, I want to know, to understand, I fucking hate you.
I don't want to go back to crying over you because I hate you. You left me dealing with this world on my own, you had no right to do that, you should have fought, you should have known, you shouldnt have left me crying on my own in the dark.
You can't keep me for you now, you left, let me go. Don't make me suffer like this, you can't do this anymore, you have no rights on me anymore, you left, you gave up on me, and God I hate you, I hate you, I hate you.
I promise to you, if what i am afraid of is true you'll be nothing anymore for me. Your necklace and your ring will be gone for good, the carebear will go in a drawer, you'll be dead for me, for the 2nd time, anyway, where are you, when was the last time you protected me and gave me something to hope for?
I could pray until I cant feel my hands anymore, until my knees hurt, for this thing to be wrong.
I hate you for leaving us, you should have fought, you should have...
Fuck you.